Thursday, November 3, 2011

Pukul anak

Just to share something that I learn throughout my journey as a mom, and also as a reminder to myself.

Having two kids is not easy, I wonder how other moms doing it. Anyway I tend to loose my temper in a snap lately, maybe because a lot of thing, Zahra with her ubat, weaning issue, new baby, etc. Zahra a bit mengada too but it's acceptable because she is adapting a new addition in her life, a brother who is stealing the attention. So she cries a lot on the first week the baby came especially when she is sleepy and I'm breastfeeding the baby. I think dia bengang kut. Anyway, it makes me bengang too! Ada one time she papppp Emir because Emir is latching and automatically I scold and papppp her hands. Ok that one not so bad, ada one night she suddenly woke up and want bak, but at the same time Emir wants too, so of course la I bagi Emir and she cries her lung out, I was so tense espc hearing the cries, and couldn't help it terus sepak her face. Instead of stopping, she cries harder!

Ok that's my story. Kebetulan lak that week, a few of my FB friend post up about how to deal with tantrums and pukul anak. There are 2 things that I remember clearly.

1) never sepak the face, it'll make her more stubborn
2) pukul at her kaki and below, never above

So I tried the methods and it works! I mean, it's easy for me to get her attention. Kalau I pukul tangan, she will resorted and pukul me balik or cry..the stubborn cry. Kalau I sepak lagi la..macam no point, dia lagi nanges ada la. I think if I sepak dia 100 kali pun she won't stop..she can be that stubborn! But if I pukul her leg, she will stop and the most pun cry, the sad cry and I'll hug her, the she's all fine.

Another tip that I think paling berjaya is, use other thing to pukul her, not direct skin to skin. This will make the kid less stubborn too. Kitaorg takde rotan, so I just grab anything nearby, mcm that day, she was angry with something and pour the anger to Emir in the rocker, so I took fan remote control and babbb her kaki sikit and said 'zahra no!'. And she stopped immediately and gave me unsatisfied look, then come to me and mengadu Emir bully her, 'mummmmyyyy..babbbbbyyy' while pointing to her fingers. That's a big difference, kalau tak dia macam lagi degil.

Oh ya, having 2 kids make me shout more too. Haishh no wonder la mak2 suara kuat, have to! Kalau tak, tak dengar kata!

I am building up my patience. Don't want the kids to grow in angry environment. Please God give me the strength! Haha..rasa drama pulak but ahh..that's what I'm experiencing now.


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9 comments:

  1. Salam,

    SANGAT-SANGAT betul!

    1 lagi, always explain to them kenapa kita tak bagi dia buat benda yang dia buat tu. takpa dia tak berapa faham janji kita bgtau perbuatan dia tu SALAH.

    kita bukan nak AJAR anak tapi nak DIDIK anak...
    ada beza tau! bukan me kata, tapi pakar motivasi kata :P

    muahahhaha

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  2. Sy pnh sepak Aydin. Tapi dia tak menangis. Sebaliknya, makin menjadi dan nak juga bt apa yg kita larang (sepak sy tak keras, mgkn salah satu sbb jugak).

    Klu sy pukul bontot, dia akan menangis sbb nmpk ganas bg die. Tatau kenapa. Nak kata sakit, ada diapers. Tapi mgkn bila pukul bontot, dia jdk takut dgn muka garang kita.

    Apa yg berkesan, pukul tangan atau kaki. Dia akan menangis tapi sekejap dan dia takut nak bt lagi. Pukul tangan sambil kata NO. So, dia faham kat situ dan terus tak berani.

    Dulu, masa mula2 pukul mmg rs bersalah yg amat. Tp klu tak dibuat mcm nie...maybe anak akan jdk mua.

    Wah, panjangnya komenku. Hiks!

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  3. cannot imagine u and your loud shout..!!!

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  4. yes correct...my mother inlaw pernah pesan kalau nak pukul anak pukul dkt bhgian bawah..bhgian kaki...itupun lepas kita bagi warning dulu...kalau tak jln juga last resort baru pukul...

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  5. Aan,
    i pun baru dapat tahu
    before this kalau pukul, always pukul dekat tangan
    no wonder la i kena pukul balik
    sbb cara tu salah

    no lepas ni nak practise pukul kat kaki
    erm, maybe dah kena sediakan rotan dekat rumah, kot?
    :D

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  6. part suara mak2 kuat tu agree..but ada gak suara pak2 yg kuat *jiran blkg rumah suara pak dia lg kuat..*

    btla la anak 2 makes mummy shout more...skrg baru la tau nape ada kes dera2 ni..sbb mak2 xtahan, lg klu pak nya sama buat dek je *mintak jauh part dera2 ni..*

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  7. Tatty,
    Kannn..hehe. At the same time nak didik diri kita untuk sabar. Usaha tangga kejayaan :D

    Fara,
    A'ah..pukul banyak jadi ketegaq, tak pukul langsung jadi muak. It's not easy..but we are trying our best kan

    Ida,
    Hahaha u wont believe it. Penat hokeh menjerit

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  8. Eni,
    Tu la..my mom dulu pun pukul kaki je, habis kuat cubit. Dengar jugak cakap..aminnn :p

    Ann,
    I think so too! Kena letak rotan ni haha. So far Alhamdulillah, Zahra dah kurang degil.

    RyyHan,
    Haha kannn...dulu me so geram with my mom why la suara kenat kuat. Now I know... Mintak jauh la dera tu..memang kadang2 tak tahan, espcially petang lepas balik keja :(

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  9. kedua-dua tu Sunnah Rasu saw

    1) never hit on the face samada isteri, anak etc

    2) hit di kaki/guna rotan. Utk tarbiyah bukan lepaskan marah.

    Hope Allah will protect and ease your family sis.

    ReplyDelete